Thursday, April 10

I Am Jack's...

Late afternoons I walk a post-apocalyptic wasteland of low blood sugar and empty-bellied angst.  I become a ravening appetite of road rage, screaming dad-ittude, short fused and ripping, slavering, masticating anything I can get my hands on.

This has been going on for two days.  I've changed my daily SOP to exclude afternoon snacking or any kind of junk/fast food shenanigans.  I'm serious about dropping weight for the Loudonville 100.  I'm serious about losing the equivalent of a small child (or medium-sized dog) from my frame. 

The other night Li'l Bean had an appointment with the gymnastics people, and I was going to haul her over the hill to town on the X.  In my thin-blooded haze I couldn't motivate her to find her helmet or locate it myself.  Then we ran out of time to make the ride.  Then when I announced we'd just drive (against my own wishes) she melted like a chocolate chip on the sun-broiled linoleum of the kitchen floor.

I wanted to give up.  I wanted to begin chewing my own leg off.  I wanted to take down a wildebeest and eat it raw...with BBQ sauce.  I just wanted the afternoon to pass without so much friction.

The whole ragged affair was the result of poor nutritional planning on my part, and the return to lunchtime cycling activity.  For breakfast I had two packets of oatmeal and black coffee.  For lunch I had a pb&j on whole wheat and a can of Ale-8.  Then...then I took off on a 13+ mile ride over to UK's campus, then into the heart of downtown Lexington, and finally I returned to the neighborhood where I work via the long straight bike lanes on Richmond Road.

I ate nothing else the rest of the afternoon.  Hangriness kicked in just as I got back into town.  I stopped at Kroger, a veritable hornets' nest of vehicular activity, and then the gas station.  By the time I was speeding up my home road I was ready to kill and eat.

Thankfully there was no junk food at home.  I would have eaten it all.

The moral of this story, Dear Readers, is that you should feed your Chainring if you want to have access to quality blog posts.  I know you read this to escape the humdrum existences you call…existences.  So send me cookies.  Send me cake.  Send me pita chips and baby carrots.  Send me oatmeal packets and baked goods.  I will eat pizza, I’ll eat jam, I’ll eat whatever you get near my maw.

I…am Jack’s hangry rage.

1 comment:

  1. I learned a lot about training and eating and loosing weight last year. It's all about timing on the eating side. Eat smart before your ride and its exceptionally important to eat after you ride. If you go hard and long you need to replace the sugar in your body, other wise you don't recover. So high glycemic index foods (yummy ice cream!) after you ride.